Why Grace at Christmas is a Good Thing
It’s that time of the year again. The time when many of us bust out trees, slap on some ill-fitting Santa hats, and sing festive songs, the lyrics of which range from the cheery (that Mariah Carey song) to the confounding (uh, The Little Drummer Boy anyone?).
Yes, it’s Christmas time.
For me, Christmas has always been a time for getting together with family and friends. I don’t have a religious background, and I don’t think I could confidently list any particular sect on a census form, but I love Christmas. When I was a kid, it was all about the presents, but as an adult, it’s been all about the people. And, in that respect, I feel very privileged by what surrounds me.
For me, Christmas is the best time of the year.
But, as I grow older and, occasionally, wiser, I also realise that Christmas isn’t like this for everyone. Christmas can drag out memories that perhaps we would prefer to be without. It can remind us of people who are not around, of stages in life we hoped to reach, or of things we hoped to achieve, but perhaps didn’t in the year that was. Of course, many of these things have nothing to do with Christmas, but it’s on this holiday in particular that they can bubble to the surface.
For many, Christmas can be the worst time of the year, and this is something I am trying to remember as the season of yule comes around.
Because while we may desperately want others to get into the festive cheer, wishing that they would only find that elusive chestnut-roasted spirit in their heart, it can often be better to simply listen to them and to give give them the space they need to get through it. You’re unlikely to turn the tide in their minds, but you may be able to make it a little easier for them to manage what could be a very tough time.
If Christmas is the best time of the year for you, but you have people around you who, for whatever reason, don’t share this joy, make an effort to sit with them, listen if they want to talk, and avoid forcing egg nog down their already overwhelmed throats. It might make it better and easier for them and you.
And that, is why a little Grace at Christmas is a very Good Thing.
Christmas can be a hard time for many people.
You don’t have to make people cheery; but sometimes simply acknowledging and listening can be helpful.
‘Wait, isn’t it up to them grinches to make themselves feel better?’ More on that after the squiggle.
Groan. Mumble. Toil and trouble.
It’s easy to think that those who are down around Christmas should be the ones that need to get it together and get with the program. I mean, whatever they’re going through is easily alleviated with some positive thought, a bon-bon, and a sappy Christmas film. Why have they gotta bring the mood down when all they need to do is get happy, right?
Urgh.
For some, when times are bright, everything can seem light. But when dark times hit, it can feel like the light is taking an extended vacation. And this is what it’s like for some people at Christmas. No matter how hard they try, the cloud of darkness can make it too hard to see the cheer others see and feel, making it hard for them to join the festivities around them.
You may ask: can’t they just make themselves feel better? Eventually, they might. But they may not have the strength or the capacity to do that.
However, being there for them, and listening to them, could be a good start.
Heard it all before?
Every time I write anything, I get the feeling that it’s all been done before. That the message is already out there. That it’s already in film, in books, in song.
There is very little created that can be deemed truly original; sometimes all that we have are derivatives, repetitions, reworks, and reinterpretations. But, like the stories themselves, we need these too. A new context can breathe new life into an old message. And that’s exactly what this is for… and why we have hundreds of new adaptations of Dickens’ A Christmas Carol every year.
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